<< Back to all Blogs
Login or Create your own free blog
Layout:
Home > Apparently I'm "cheap"...
 

Apparently I'm "cheap"...

September 10th, 2006 at 05:06 pm

This is just a PSA to be careful about with whom you talk about money!

I went out to lunch with a girlfriend of mine on Friday. Normally we get along really well, but money is becoming a really sticky issue between us.

She is very, very spendy and is in serious money trouble. They're upside down on their HOUSE (let alone the credit cards, car payment, other loans). I'm honestly scared for them.

Anyway, we were making idle chit chat and complaining about how much time we spent on the phone and I made an offhand comment that I had spent so much time on hold with one of my credit cards that I can now recite the entire spiel (Your call is very important to us...)

She asked was I was waiting so long for, and I told her that I was trying to get them to waive my annual fee. (I had gotten a Mariott Visa last year to take advantage of some of their promos. The card has an annual fee, which they waived for the first year. I refuse to pay annual fees for CCs, so I was calling to either have them waive it or to close the account. They were able to switch my account to another reward card without an annual fee.)

When she heard what I was calling for, she started laughing and said "God, you are so cheap!" The hell??? I'm cheap because I don't pay unnecessary fees?

It was quite an awkward moment. I finally said something like "Why would I pay it if I don't have to?" and the conversation moved on.

I totally regret ever discussing money with her. She's put 2 + 2 together from comments I've made and understands that DH and I are in pretty good shape, and I think it makes her defensive since she ALWAYS feels the need to bring up money!

We stopped at Target after lunch so I could pick up a birthday present for my godson, and I felt ill watching her fill up the cart with stuff she didn't need and couldn't afford. I know I'm not responsible for her behavior, but I felt like I had taken an alcoholic to a bar, you know?

I've learned a lesson--no more discussing money with my friends, no matter how vague the terms!

7 Responses to “Apparently I'm "cheap"...”

  1. LuckyRobin Says:

    I tend to respond to comments like that with a tilt of my head, a steady in the eyes gaze, and a "Huh...really." Not with a question mark. Seems to confuse them. LOL

  2. princessperky Says:

    you are not cheap, you are solvent! you can afford your life!

    I find talking of money a sure fire way to lose friends..

  3. baselle Says:

    Can I tell you a little secret? Only other frugal people will say you are frugal. To the spendthrift, everyone is cheap. Smile
    You didn't say if her laugh was mean or what, but a sense of humor helps in these moments. I have said in that situation, "you laugh, but I'm laughing all the way to the bank." And then smile broadly.

    The Target situation would sadden me, too.

  4. Thrifty Ray Says:

    Only frugalites understand why plugging the small holes is so important to financial wellness.

    Your friend is a textbook example of someone who would benefit more than most from a lesson in Frugal 101.

  5. Carolina Bound Says:

    Your friend sounds just like my sister. She insinutates that I'm cheap, too; which is hilarious. If I were really cheap, I wouldn't have this $#$@ debt now, would I? She worries me so much. Nice to know I'm not the only one called cheap, though.

  6. miclason Says:

    oh, my sis doesn't say it, but, her eyes say it all for her!...she's become a bit more frugal (or less of a spendthrift, rather?) by sheer necessity! ...the cc's caught up with her!...meaning she doesn't have enough available balance to keep using them!...so, NOW she is trying to cut expenses...of course, she sees this whole experience as horrid and "unfair"... I remember when I hit that point (which was much sooner, only because I lost my job and had to take a pay cut, not because I was much wiser!)...I was very bitter, but, at least I recognized it was MY own fault!

  7. lrjohnson Says:

    Well, I think you may have planted a seed. Take the alcoholic analogy: when I was a practicing one, sober lives just didn't make sense to me, I didn't get it, and thought they were lucky and I was cursed. But later on when I was ready to deal with stuff, thinking of folks who had it together helped me. It may not look like she is taking things in, but when it hits the wall for her, the lessons she was gaetting from you will bubble up inher mind. you are doing her good; it just may not take effect for 5 or 10 years.

Leave a Reply

(Note: If you were logged in, we could automatically fill in these fields for you.)
*
Will not be published.
   

* Please spell out the number 6.  [ Why? ]

vB Code: You can use these tags: [b] [i] [u] [url] [email]